What has 8 legs, stripes and a problem with humps?

By sizemore Last edited 217 months ago
What has 8 legs, stripes and a problem with humps?
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It's not often you hear of efforts to get an eleven year old and a nine year old to shag each other senseless by forcing them to sniff old boots. Well not on the corner of the Internet that we hang around on anyway. We are of course talking tigers.

Raika and Lumper need a little help getting in the mood (perhaps having something to do with swapping the romantic climes of Indonesia with the death-is-in-the-air trappings of London Zoo) so keepers are encouraging them to sniff "a range of strong smells, from keepers' Wellington boots to herbs and perfumes" in order to 'stimulate' the pair. We think that's polite newspeak for Lumper needing to get his penis erect enough to slip inside Raika's hopefully wet enough vagina. At least we think that's how it works with big pussies.

Nothing is ever simple though and it turns out that these two aren't your regular tiggers:

They are genetically endangered, so are quite vulnerable, so we would really like these two to breed

That sounds like part of a director's commentary for Universal Solider, "...this is where Dolph takes Jean-Claude from behind. Bang Van Damn, thank you ma'am!"

The curator also goes on to say that Raika "had had reproductive problems but that she was beginning to cycle again"...

Say what you like about putting animals in cages, but making them commute in this traffic is just an accident waiting to happen.

Last Updated 13 February 2006