Happy Slapping Hits London

By london_luke Last edited 150 months ago
Happy Slapping Hits London
commuters_400.jpg

So you're standing there on the Tube, seething with rage after having changed trains three times due to a Job-like trial of passenger action, faulty trains and general incompetence on the part of London Underground Limited, and having just suffered a twelve minute intra-tunnel endurance test with only one foot really supporting your weight, pressed so close to your fellow sufferers that you're pretty sure you can count the change in their pockets and tell the religion of that nice man behind you.

The windows are steamed up, streaming the condensed exhaled breath of all and sundry, including the alcoholic who's presently drooling on your new coat. You finally pull into a station. You are at breaking point; your teeth are gritted and there is some serious pulsing action on the old temple veins.

All in all, a pretty normal day on the Tube, right?

Now imagine some chavvy little git walks up and slaps you across the face, all the while being filmed by his reprobate chum on his new camera phone. You've been "happy slapped". More than likely, before you know it you are the subject of much tweenie merriment.

People, this has arrived in London. All we here at Londonist can say is, it's only a matter of time before we see the first retaliatory lynching. Surely this is what the temporary insanity plea was invented for. Right?

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Last Updated 02 February 2005

Katcha

lord help the person that does that to me.

Kaz

Kids today. Tuh.

Frankie Roberto

I blogged this a while back (playground crazes: happy slap tv), and consequently got plagued by comments from idiot kids...

Frankie

Chris

That`s because in england is a bit diferent than USA or Brazil, if a stupid guy like those tried to slap someone, soon or later he would get a bullet in the head.

Tamil

if these kids little thugs wanna try 'slap' or play-play fools with me, be it on the train, bus or street then one of them is gonna get knocked out with a hardcore vicious punch!! some one has to learn and people need to stand up for themselves more. dont be cowards and they will get the picture that it is not on..

Lauren

if anyone ever did that to me they'd wish they were dead. Who do they think they are? They've got no right to touch anyone else they dont know, never mind to slap them. Im only 13 and I think it's sad that other kidds my age and older think they can go around doing what they want, and thinking they own everyone. They piss me off.

Andrew Porter

I'm doing a graphic design degree, and have set myself a brief called "the kids aren't alright" in which I am studying the decline of behaviour in todays youth culture.

If anyone has any good links relating to the happy slapping problems, or any other sources for information on my subject, feel free to email me or post back on this site.

Cheers guys

ct

Biking home from work the other day I passed a gang of teens who shouted abuse and one of the smaller ones ran up and swung a punch at me. If I'd got off the bike I would have had the other 15 on me. Between me and the little cocky bloke, he'd lose badly but then if he hadn't been with all the others, he wouldn't have been so ballsy in the first place.

Mal

I am seriously hoping to be targeted by these idiots so that I can beat/crush/impale/pummel the living snot out of one or all of them. And if I should be surrounded by (15?) as the previous post said, then the key is to take on one person only, usually the "leader" and be sure not to spread your focus to the others no matter if you are being kicked or punched, and then just concentrate on reducing that single person to a barely recognizable state. That's the only way to handle this situation; match force with force.

Mal

I am seriously hoping to be targeted by these idiots so that I can beat/crush/impale/pummel the living snot out of one or all of them. And if I should be surrounded by (15?) as the previous post said, then the key is to take on one person only, usually the "leader" and be sure not to spread your focus to the others no matter if you are being kicked or punched, and then just concentrate on reducing that single person to a barely recognizable state. That's the only way to handle this situation; match force with force.

d-o-y-l-e

happy slaps are well good av some fun itin

Sten48532

I've just been hanging out not getting anything done. What can I say? I've basically been doing nothing worth mentioning, but pfft. Not that it matters. Pretty much nothing exciting happening to speak of. I haven't been up to much these days.

paddy

its not that bad theres alot worse out there it didnt come to london it started there but ud have to think why someone whould do such acts maybe thay are less fortunate than yourselfs?

annon

fuck off right now.