Dan Geller Is Coming To Your House

By Rob Last edited 151 months ago
Dan Geller Is Coming To Your House
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If you live in Harrow, Hammersmith or Fulham beware...Uri Geller's son might be knocking on my door to try and persuade you to vote Tory.

Today's Independent carries an interview with Daniel Geller who is apparently "disturbed by modern manners and baseball-cap mores," and wants to see a return "to a gentle, patrician, John Stuart Mill 'English gentleman' model of both politics and society".

To this end Daniel has joined the City of London and Westminster Association and the Hyde Park Estate Association amenities committee, but it seems more than anything Daniel does not want to live in his father's, frankly bonkers, shadow.

Which is a shame, because the Independent seem intent on reminding him what a fruitloop his dad is at every opportunity.

From the introduction to the article: "Like his father, Daniel Geller wants to shape our minds. But it's not aliens or spoon-bending he's promoting, it's Michael Howard."

The opening paragraph: "If you happen to live in a marginal constituency in the south of England and a strikingly handsome young man knocks on your door in the next few weeks announcing that he is canvassing for the Conservative Party, keep an eye on your best cutlery."

From the second paragraph: "If you believe in the paranormal powers of Geller's famous father...you may fear that Geller Snr's cutlery-bending powers will have somehow passed to his only son and that the Mappin and Webb is in mortal danger."

Opening of the third paragraph: "The fact that young Geller does not claim to have any spoon-bending powers at all will not prevent him, of course, from bending your ear on any number of his political platforms."

Are you getting the idea yet? Dan's dad bends spoons you know!

We'll skip the fourth paragraph as it's a potted history of Geller senior's career. Paragraph five is the first not to mention Dan Geller and cutlery in the same sentence, but that's soon put right in paragraph six: "Geller is determined that, in his case, the spoons of the father shall not be visited upon the children."

Hmmm, not much chance of that if you keep making 'spoons of the father' quips is there?

The article then slips into conventional interview mode and we seem to be doing ok...right up until the final question: "Isn't there something weird about you, some paranormal thing that's been slipped into your DNA, I ask?"

Good grief.

Last Updated 22 February 2005